I am the very proud owner of an Angharad portrait of Dolly Parton, she beams down on me as I sleep.  I love Dolly and I love my Dolly.

I mentioned before that I tried to make all of my Christmas presents in 2011 and have provided little evidence of this so far but it occured to me with about four days to go that I had nothing for Mr Kapow!  We’d agreed not to buy gifts but I felt a wee something was required and gazing up at Dolly I whispered, “I wonder….”

It started off as a laugh.  I knew I would never be able to create anything like what Angharad does and I wouldn’t have disrespected her art by even beginning to imagine that I had the time or the skills required but Mr K finds much of my artwork hilarious.  You see, don’t tell anyone but the thing is I’m really not very good.  My approach to drawing for example is incredibly direct.  I draw shapes rather than lines, it’s just the way my brain works.  While Mr K builds up a sketch or a painting until it captures the life of something, I basically draw the most important bits and leave the rest blank.  I don’t do shadows, I can’t do colour.

It would be hilarious, thought I, if I attempted to sew a portrait of my darling husband for his Christmas.  Furthermore, I was tired of him stealing my hot water bottle (our flat has no central heating and is very very cold) so decided I should make him a cover.

So I went to good old Watt Brothers, stalwart of Sauchiehall St, and purchased a bottle.  I figured that fleece would be a good base and one of the many perks of working in a fabric shop is you don’t have to go very far to find some.  Since Mr K has been building bridges with his Dad, from whom he had been estranged, I felt it would be apt to use a Royal Stewart Tartan.  Stewart being his former surname (changed by deed poll aged 21) and also since he’s a bit of a punk fan, Royal Stewart being the punk tartan of choice.

Armed with my fabric and some Bondaweb I locked Mr K in his studio and went for it.  Tentative at first, I shook off my hesitancy knowing that no matter how it turned out he’d love it.  It was more applique than stitch sketching in the end.  The hair and eyebrows are black velvet and for the nose and mouth since I have no hand embroidery skills to speak of I used the machine entirely.  I don’t think it turned out half bad?!

Ahem, so….well…. this is not a ‘normal’ Kapow post by any means so bear with me…

Here’s the story:

At New Year while staying in Saltaire with our dear friends Kirsty and Joe I saw on television an advert for World of Warcraft starring Chuck Norris.  I didn’t understand it.

Firstly, I didn’t know who Chuck Norris was although I had heard the name on several occasions and guessed he was some sort of martial arts type guy.  He has a silly name (sorry Chuck) that sadly provoked stereotypical thoughts in my brain that he probably wasn’t that smart (I know, based on a NAME!?), was American and was not as cool as Van Damme or Seagal for instance (who I compare all men to of course).

Mr Kapow ended up staying on in Yorkshire for another week as he had return tickets the following weekend and it meant he could spend more time with Billy the Kid so I returned home alone and was at a loose end due to a few more days off work.

For some reason I kept thinking about Chuck Norris.

So I googled him and read on Wikipedia a load of stuff which failed to interest me but was pleased to see I was right about the martial arts stuff.  I followed a link to Chuck Norris Facts which I realised was why I mostly know who he is and that gave me a wee giggle but I was still feeling unfulfilled.

That’s when I realised that my curiosity was not with regard to Chuck at all, it was World of Warcraft!  I also suddenly had a flashback montage of other adverts I had seen starring William Shatner (one of my heroes), Verne Troyer and Ozzy Osbourne and Mr T, all people I obviously respect.  Konnie Kapow you see is something of a closet sci-fi fan and geekophile.

So obviously I now google WoW!  I know a little bit about it in so far as it is an internet game more than likely involving a war.  I know that people have avatars on it and have read in the papers etc about WoW weddings and such.  I start to read stuff about it and realise that it’s massive but I have a low attention span and there were too many words so I thought to myself, why not just try playing it, then you’ll know!

Here’s where we have a problem:  I’m not a gamer for a very good reason: I have a split ‘gaming’ personality.

One of me thinks it’s stupid.  It’s a waste of time, energy and money.  When all my friends were getting Mega Drives, Amstrads, Commodore 64s, Nintendo thingies and Master Systems my parents were dead against it and they were right.  We’re talking the 80s/early 90s here and even then the consoles and games were very expensive and my Dad especially felt very strongly that kids who were ‘plugged’ into computers instead of reading books and outside playing were going to be dulled. It wasn’t fair obviously but I got it, in fact, I never asked them to buy me one, I wouldn’t have because I knew what the answer would be.

We were allowed one and a half hours of television per day and were supposed to check the radio times or whatever paper we had in advance to plan what we wanted to watch.  Still to this day I am not comfortable having the television on when we have company or there is nothing on I specifically want to watch.  My father is 100 miles away but he still makes me feel guilty for watching tv.  I have never had a tv in my bedroom apart from when I only had a bedroom at Uni.  This is not a bad thing, he was right (even if it did mean I had to watch Pugwall’s Summer with the volume really low so he wouldn’t know!).

The other personality I own however is an addict.

In an act of sheer hypocrisy when I was about 17 and she 11, my parents let my youngest sister have a PS1.  The PS2 was out by then so she was still a complete throwback but I was utterly incredulous.  Aghast.

She never played it.  Never.  I was intrigued though and started messing around with the games that came with it (it was 2nd hand) which as far as I recal were Rayman, Driver, Grand Theft Auto and Tomb Raider.  My sister watched while I played, I think she was probably a bit young for the games and scared of them.  I became utterly addicted to Tomb Raider and Resident Evil to the extent where I stayed up till about 5am every night and made excuses not to go out and see friends.  My boyfriend ended up ‘watching’ me play instead of us going out.  It took over my life.  My life did not resume until i had completed every Tomb Raider / Resident Evil there was and I made a promise to myself never to speak of this and never to play a game again.

However, several years later I met ‘Steve’, he was a hot American guy I had a very tempestuous and mostly sexual relationship with.  ‘Steve’ had an XBox and he loved it.

‘Steve’ was born in Texas and I got on far better with his mother than I ever did with him.  I could write a whole post about him, but that’s for a more personal blog!  Suffice to say he was hot, very tall and strong and had a really sexy Southern accent. We had a lot of fun together but he was also a bit of a wanker.

Once he made me play Halo with him in the multi-player combat thingy.  I had no idea what the controls were or even the aim of the game and he wouldn’t tell me.  He just killed me over and over again, sometimes within seconds of my ‘coming back to life’, I wouldn’t even get a chance to move and he’d kill me.  He enjoyed this a bit too much.  Eventually I gathered enough ‘skill’ to run away from him but this was not my idea of fun.

I had told him about my affection for Resident Evil so for my birthday or something he got me Silent Hill for his XBox.  I was only allowed to play it when he was there though and he bought the strategy guide and a laser pointer and (I shit you not) I was only allowed to do what he told me to do.  We played in the dark (it’s a pretty scary game actually) and he used his flashlight to read the strategy guide and give me instructions and then used the laser pointer to show me where to go on the screen.  I tell you, the guy was a complete control freak.  Don’t get me started on him following me to the bathroom!

Anyway, I have digressed somewhat massively but never mind.  All of this combined means that it was with trepidation I downloaded WoW.  Had I not been alone for several days I would never have done it.  I wouldn’t have wanted anyone to know you see (she says on her public blog!).

So the first thing is I have to create a character.  I can choose between  Alliance and Horde who seem to be like goodies and baddies, and then choose a ‘race’.  I am vain and do not want an ugly character so go with the cuter in general Alliance.  I choose a Night Elf whatever that means and give her purple hair.  You have to then select what class you want to be.  I made mine a hunter because that meant I got to have a pet tiger.  Right.  What do I do now?

I have to give my character a name.  This has me scratching my head for some time… it has to be something cool right?  I should think of something that will make me fit in because I imagine everyone has really imaginative names.  I’m stumped though.

I have never been good at names:  my teddy was called Freddy, my Barbie was called Barbie and my imaginary horse was called Callypo because that’s what was written on the side of my horse, er, bike.  So Callypo it was.  I started to play and it took me hours to get to level 3 and work out how to use the controls especially as I was playing on a laptop with no mouse so was using the trackpad and key controls.  The first time though that I saw a ‘real’ person in there I was really excited.  I tried to talk to them but they just ignored me.

I got bored, I kept dying because I wasn’t quick enough with my trackpad and I must say I was very disappointed that no one was talking to me.  My pet tiger was also a bit too annoying for a noob like me, it kept running off and starting fights with things I couldn’t kill.  I decided to create another character.

This time I thought I might get to talk to someone if I didn’t look like such a nancy, you know, if I looked more like a serious gamer’s character so I went with the undead.  A zombie character in the Horde.  Again I had a serious problem with my name.  I tried to clear my mind of everything and use the first name which popped into my head which was………………………..Tamara………….wow, bit of an anti-climax there!  I stuck with it though for lack of anything better but had to make it less boring (I had by now seen some other people’s names and they all seemed pretty impressive.

Tamara Tambourine.

That, is the best I could do.  I’m a disgrace.

To my utter horror though I couldn’t fit it all in and by the time I was playing realised too late that my character was called Tamaratambour.  Och well, by accident it’s a bit better.  She was a hunter too, I liked the pet concept too much and this time I got a spider which I named Seth.  (Callypo’s tiger was called Cat)

I should have learned the first time though.  While I got better at fighting and completing tasks, still my pet was a pain in the arse and still no one would talk to me.

Time for a new tactic again, this time I need to be really hot!  I figured that in light of the avatar thingy notsohotandconfidentinreallife people were quite likely to be hot in WoW and therefore a little more talkative non?  I created a new character called Valpestra (named after a song by Sting called ‘Valparaiso’ – long story involving a drunken conversation with friends where I claimed Sting had ‘done tantric’ to me through the radio).

Valpestra is a Draenei (some sort of alien perhaps?) Mage so was the first character who did not have a pet.  Sure I was a bit lonely and I had no idea what a Mage was but I went with it.  It turned out though that she was a bit too sexy, everywhere I went I was plagued by Polish guys saying “Hey! You Sexy!”.  One guy saved my life by healing me during a fight with some beastie thing and then when I said thank you asked if I wanted to “do more than talk?”  What does that mean?  Did he want to pretend to have sex with me?  Who was he?  How old was he?  Was he even a he?  (that was a silly question actually, of course he was male!)

Valpestra’s life soon began to mirror my own (snigger) and she was plagued by suitors to the extent that I again decided I needed a change.  I’d go over to the Horde (or bad guys) which was a bit more fun so finally I created  Konniekapow and she was my favourite!  She’s a Blood Elf Paladin and I designed her to look a bit like Cher.  I got quite good as her albeit using the laptop but some tasks you need to be part of a group to complete and I had no idea how to go about this, again I felt a little bit lonely and excluded.  On my own though I got to level 20 which is the limit before you need to start paying.

This week I have been ill and spent most of my time in bed or on the couch so I have played my fair share of WoW and eventually it was time to create a new character again.  Just to see what was different, for the first time I created a male character.

He’s a troll warrior called Archiebaldie (thank you) and almost immediately I started getting challenged to fight by other players, something which never happened when I was a girl.

For the first time in the two weeks I have been playing WoW I got invited to join a group today and it is this experience I am really writing this blog in order to tell you about!

So I am standing in the middle of a town, a level 7 Warrior which is not very good and I am approached by 3 or 4 other (Swedish) characters who start talking to me and for some reason seem to find it hilarious that I ‘can’t talk’.  I am very confused by this because I am talking to them and they can see it but I’m guessing that they have the full version not just the free trial and that they can actually speak with their voices?  (?)

So here’s what happened:

I myself prefer a below the knee skirt which is still sexy provided you wear the right shoes and have nice calfs and ankles (particularly if you’re very tall like me).  Cath and my other sister Claire call me “Granny” due to my vintage inspired wardrobe and often conservative outfits.  What can I say, I’m a classy bird with a large collection of cardigans and headscarves!

Anyway, I’m sure you’ll agree that Cath looks gorgeous, she needs little help from me!

The fabric was from Mandors and it’s on sale right now if they have any left!

The pattern is a Simplicity one from the early 90s.

Cath wasn’t so keen on the headscarf/polo (turtle? where I come from it’s a polo neck and the collared t-shirt is a polo shirt!) neck combo, can’t imagine why!

I’ll do my best to pin Claire down and get a photo of her in her playsuit before she goes to Australia for 6 months on Monday!

I usually post one a week on a Wednesday but will do it more regularly until I have caught up! Should you be interested in a feature then follow this link to fill in the form, do bear in mind however that there’s a bit of a ‘waiting list’.

Name: Nat

From: O’blue Thrashion

Occupation: I work full time as a collection manager in an art museum and craft in the evenings

Favourite colour: blue

Favourite animal: polar bear

Favourite band: The Clash

Favourite band: A crack up at the race riots by Harmony Korinne

Shop / Business name:  O’blue Thrashion

What you make: 

I make jewellery from recycled skateboards

How did you know you were crafty / artistic?

Always have been but studied a fine art degree too!

What was the first thing you ever made?

Hard to pin point! I made a voteuristic padded cell for an exhibition?!

Do you have any formal training or who taught you what you know?

I have a Fine Art Degree, and a Museum Studies Masters Degree

How did your craft business come about?

I started making jewellery for friends and family out of old discarded toys and it grew organically on its own

Where and when do you do your crafting?

I craft in my Greenhouse which I have converted into a studio

Tell me something surprising about yourself:

I’m married to a welsh punk!

Which Folksy shop can you not get enough of?

Skull and Cross Buns – Awesome handcarved stamps

Why is handmade / crafting important to you?

I strongly believe in the recycling ethic

Is it just me or is crafting really hot right now?

It seems to be but I think it will become more popular over the next 10 years

Ok you’ve got me convinced! Where can I find you?

Twitter
Facebook

Last year for Christmas I decided to try to make all of my Christmas presents.  I fell a little bit short in the end due to time (poor Dad’s jumper still only has half a sleeve) but managed to make almost all of them.  In light of this, I extended the invitation to everyone else that they should try to make their presents too or if not then just give a small ‘token gift.’

I could not have imagined that I would get anything as awesome as the gift from Milly!

It’s a folder she’s put together of Vintage Knitting patterns, the oldest of which is from 1949.  What makes it even more special is that they belonged to her best friend Gill’s mother who passed away recently.  What a great lady she must have been, I’ve heard much about her and she kept her patterns in great condition!

I love the pictures and the patterns but am also very taken with the old adverts interpersed throughout.

Here are a few of my favourites…

I usually post one a week on a Wednesday but will do it more regularly until I have caught up! Should you be interested in a feature then follow this link to fill in the form, do bear in mind however that there’s a bit of a ‘waiting list’.

Name: Laura Hawkins

From: Edinburgh

Occupation: Lighting Technicain and Designer

Favourite colour: purple

Favourite animal: horses

Favourite book: Any by Christopher Brookmyre (ok know that’s cheating a bit!)

Shop / Business name:  Little Red Star

What you make: 

kitsch and colourful jewellery

How did you know you were crafty / artistic?

When i was pretty young. One granny taught me knitting, crochet and cross stitch, the other sewing and drawing

What was the first thing you ever made?

Hair scrunchies (remember them?!)

Do you have any formal training or who taught you what you know?

Nothing formal, learnt it myself or taught by Grannies

How did your craft business come about?

When i left my permanent job to become self employed i needed soemthing to pass the time between contracts and the jewellery making went from being a bit time hobby to something more.

Where and when do you do your crafting?

Mostly at home, but can also be found behind a lighting desk making bracelets when i have a quiet show

Tell me something surprising about yourself:

i don’t think i’m that suprising really!

Which Folksy shop can you not get enough of?

hmmm, i would say Cassia Beck, her photographs are beautiful

Why is handmade / crafting important to you?

Everything seems to be going down the mass produced and bland route. And i hate that. Even as i kid i refused to have something if other people had it, i didn’t want to be like everyone else and hand made stuff gives you that unique edge. And you know time and effort has gone in to making it and it means something to not only the buyer but the seller too

Ok you’ve got me convinced! Where can I find you?

Facebook

Folksy

Twitter

The evil, son smothering, judgemental, beady-eyed and jealous ‘mother-in-law’ is a woman who’s persona is well instilled thanks to comedians, movies, stories and actual real life stories!  All too often I hear other women in particular complaining about theirs and some of their stories are genuinely awful particularly when it comes to disagreements on childcare or decisions which relate to the man they have in common.

I have heard stories about women coming home to find their homes rearranged, mother-in-laws who won’t actually acknowledge their son’s wives at all and grannies who defy the wishes of their daughter in law while looking after their grand-children.

My mother-in-law’s name is Chrisy and I hate to disappoint you but we both agree that if we’d met aside from Mr Kapow, we’d probably have been friends anyway.

She loves her son more than anything but from the word go she has treated me as my own person, not just someone who affects her precious boy.  Often in fact, she’ll side with me during a ‘debate’ although sometimes she won’t – she follows the path she deems to be right.

In fact, she’s honest.  Always.

If I can get her permission I would like to share a ‘book report’ she sent me when I asked her to read my favourite book.  (She hated it).

She never compromises on an opinion because more often than not actually, she IS right (apart from about the book).  She’s an excellent judge of character (well obviously!), she is slow to jump to judgement and she is someone to whom integrity and ‘doing the right thing’ really matters to.  I can talk to her about anything.  Sure, sometimes I won’t like what she has to say but it will always be something to think about.

She’s hilarious.  I love to wind her up, I’m terrible.  Her partner Mike often refers to me as “that little witch” but I’m Scottish, if I mock you that means I like you!

Much of Mr Kapow’s artistic talent comes from her.  She’s a talented photographer, painter, cook, knitter and a bunting-maker extraordinaire!  She often tells me she can’t do something or isn’t good at it (sewing for instance) and then you’ll discover something she’s made and be very confused by its skill.  (Actually, she’s a bit of an attention seeker, non?)

She loves great music, she has a great sense of style and an enviable wardrobe.  She’s a bit of a glamourpuss really with a naughty streak just like me.  On a few occasions we’ve had a little too much gin/wine together and caused quite a lot of mayhem.  These incidents are now limited for public safety.

I’m writing this because she’s having a bad time through no fault of her own and she doesn’t deserve it.  I’m writing this because it’s all true.

I’m one lucky lucky daughter-in-law.

Due to my extended absence there’s been yet another gap in the Folksy Celebrity postings but I hope to get back on track with this too as so many people took the time to answer my questions and some of their work is so fantastic.

I usually post one a week on a Wednesday but will do it more regularly until I have caught up! Should you be interested in a feature then follow this link to fill in the form, do bear in mind however that there’s a bit of a ‘waiting list’.

I’m really excited about this week in particular because I truly love this shop!  She filled out the questionnaire in MARCH 2011 so has probably forgotten all about this.  Without further ado….

Name: Gail Griggs

From: Cheshire

Occupation: I’m a photographer by trade and do family portraits, weddings, corporate events, but my arty prints have been taking up more of my time recently.

Favourite colour: Green

Favourite animal: Chickens

Favourite book: Tricky … at the moment it’s The Gruffalo!

Shop / Business name:  Photography by Gail Griggs

What you make: 

Vintage style prints using an original 1940s camera. I use a technique called ‘through the viewfinder’ (TTV), where you take a digital image through the viewfinder of an old camera. My images are also available as greetings cards which are handmade and signed.

How did you know you were crafty / artistic?

I think I’ve always been encouraged in that sense so I don’t think there is a starting point. My mum does a lot of sewing and my dad is always making something for the house.

What was the first thing you ever made?

Photography wise, I first did a photography GCSE at school in the early 1990′s but I only started taking and selling TTV images in 2010.

Do you have any formal training or who taught you what you know?

I have GCSE’s and City and Guilds qualifications, and I also ran a family portrait studio a few years ago which gave me loads of experience.

How did your craft business come about?

Like may others, it became more tricky to balance long shoots when I had my first child so I had to find something I could do more from home.

Where and when do you do your crafting?

Whenever I have time and in a tiny study at home. Though more often than not I take over the dining room table.

Tell me something surprising about yourself:

I’m currently trying to take one photo a day as part of a 365 project in an attempt to take more photos, more regularly. It’s hard work … it’s only March and I’ve got 68 photos already.

Which Folksy shop can you not get enough of?

I love this style of jewellery from Silk purse, sows ear. (This is one of my favourite shops too! – Konnie)

Is it just me or is crafting really hot right now?

I think you’re right! I think (and hope) that people are valuing handcrafted and unique quality items more, rather than cheap and cheerful mass produced high street items.

Ok you’ve got me convinced! Where can I find you?

Website

Facebook

Folksy

I was due to attend a wedding and wanted something amazing to wear, realising though that I probably wasn’t ready to make a dress I called my wonderful friend Jenny and she agreed to come over and help me.  Jenny is a tutor at The Life Craft and runs her own craft business making these fab cushions.  Jenny is such a great teacher, I really click with her style and she was quietly encouraging to the extent that I got on much better than I expected with the toile for my dress.  (More about ‘the dress’ another time…)

I know it was ages ago but I’m kind of living in the past here in blog land!  There’s been much happening and no time to write!  So anyway, Hallowe’en (told you!) is a big time of year in a fabric shop.  The staff at Mandors were encouraged to dress up and especially to make our own costumes.  In fact, there was a competition.

I was initially very daunted by this, I don’t normally do Hallowe’en and certainly have never made my own costume…but I couldn’t be a spoil sport now could I?!  I got myself a pattern which I initially found really intimidating but realised that if I just remained calm and read the instructions properly.  I had a little vision of Jenny appear above my head and she said “you can do it!”

“I’ll try Jenny.  I’ll try.”

It took me many hours and much unpicking and resewing but this was the result…

I didn’t win the competition but it was all about the taking part anyway.  I was followed around by many children that week who wanted to talk to Snow White!

You can see some of the other costumes on Mandors’ facebook page.

This blog is not an advert for Mandors, they haven’t paid me to write this but apart from the fabric, the staff are what makes it such a fab place to work.  They are all so talented and I’ve been pumping them for information ever since I got there!  It’s been a great confidence boost as the job involves a bit of making for displays etc as well as knowledge of patterns and fabric and everyone has been very encouraging.  I was very nervous the first time I was asked to dress a dummy (in a kimono) but really pleased that I seemed to pull it off!

No one treats you like a noob or laughs when you get something wrong (well, they do a bit).

With my confidence blooming would you believe my luck when my dear friend Carol said her mother had a machine in the garage which had been there for several years and wondered if I might make some use of it!  WOULD I?!

Carol brought it round for me in September (everything happened in September!) and it was love at first sight!  It’s a Singer 507 and the receipt tucked away in the manual informs me that it was purchased new in 1978.

After it had been for a wee service I put it straight to work and hacked up an old duvet cover to attempt my first ever item – a skirt.

It won’t be appearing at London Fashion Week but I’m off to a start no?